How to delay ejaculation and last longer in bed

In this article, the LOVE Team offers up some tips to help you delay orgasm, to prolong sex and improve your sexual relationships.

Premature ejaculation is a male sexual disorder characterised by rapid ejaculation, usually within 1-2 minutes of the onset of penetration, or sometimes even just before penetration. In other words, premature ejaculation occurs when a man has difficulty controlling his ejaculation. This can lead to feelings of shame for a man and suffering for both couples.

If premature ejaculation has been affecting you for more than 3 months and occurs during most of your sexual encounters, it’s time to take control of the situation!

There are several techniques that can help you to better control your ejaculation and make sex last longer.

The stop-and-start method consists in stimulating your penis until the last second before orgasm, then stopping the stimulation until you no longer feel the urge to come. Repeat this technique several times, so that you begin to recognise the phase of sexual excitement that occurs just before orgasm. You can also practise this method during sexual intercourse. While penetrating your partner, if you feel like you’re about to climax, withdraw and resume foreplay. Give yourself some time to calm down a bit, then get back to work!

The squeeze method is also very effective in prolonging the pleasure. When you are too excited, ask your partner to squeeze the tip of your penis at the frenulum for at least 30 seconds. This will stop the flow of blood into your penis and stop the ejaculation just before it's too late. Repeat this process 4 or 5 times in a row.

Deliberately focusing your attention on something other than sex can be an effective technique to better control your orgasm and make sex last longer. When you’re really excited, your brain is flooded with thoughts and sensations that push you to climax quickly. So you can try to take your attention away from your excitement and think about something else.

Of course, it is important to focus on thoughts or images that will sufficiently distract you without completely taking you away from the sex you’re having. For example, it can be incredibly helpful to focus on your breathing or on how your partner is feeling. You can also visualise scenes or images that may temporarily distract your attention.

Kegel exercises are an effective technique for strengthening the pelvic floor muscles and improving the quality of your sexual relations. These exercises consist in contracting and relaxing the pelvic floor muscles (the ones you use to stop the flow of urine). By strengthening these muscles, you can improve your ability to control your ejaculation and make sex last longer.

Kegel exercises are easy to perform and can be done anywhere, at any time of day. Simply contract your pelvic floor muscles for 5 seconds and then relax them for another 5 seconds. Repeat this exercise 10 to 20 times a day, gradually increasing the number of contractions over time. By doing these exercises regularly, you’ll tone up your perineum to better control your orgasms.

Working on breathing can help you relax and better control your level of arousal during sex. When you breathe properly, you can oxygenate your brain and body, which will make you feel more relaxed. Deep breathing can also help you focus on the moment and ground yourself in the sexual experience, without getting caught up in your thoughts or emotions.

To use breathing as a way to relax and control your orgasm, simply breathe in deeply through your nose and out through your mouth. You can also try synchronising your breathing with your partner's to create an even stronger sexual connection.

Finding the right position can help prevent you from getting too aroused, too quickly. By adopting a more passive position, you can allow your partner to control the rhythm of the session. For example, the girl-on-top position, where your partner straddles you, can allow her to control your pleasure as well as her own. The doggy-style position, on the other hand, is not recommended in this case: the sight of your partner's bottom, the feeling of control and the depth of penetration will really turn you on, making you climax sooner.

Ejaculation delay products, like condoms with a numbing gel or orgasm-delaying creams, can help you last longer by decreasing your level of arousal and the sensitivity of your penis. The numbing gel in some condoms work by temporarily reducing the sensitivity of your skin and minimising the sensations you feel during sex. Apply an orgasm-delaying cream to your penis before sex for the same effect.

However, it is important to note that these products are not a miracle cure. They are not always effective and won’t work the same way for everyone. Plus, the ingredients in these products are potentially allergenic. Always test the product on a small patch of skin before using it with a partner to ensure that it does not cause irritation or any other side effects.

Your lifestyle can have a significant impact on the quality of your erections and your ability to keep your penis hard. A healthy, balanced diet rich in fruit, vegetables, lean protein and other essential nutrients can help maintain overall health and improve blood flow. Plus, getting enough sleep (at least 7 hours a night!) is important for regulating sex hormones, which play a key role in erection quality. Regular exercise can also help maintain good blood flow and regulate sex hormones. Finally, avoiding smoking and excessive alcohol consumption can also help improve the quality of your erections.

If you have tried these tips for maintaining your erection and have not noticed any noticeable change, we recommend that you see a healthcare professional. Your doctor can help you identify the possible causes of your difficulties in maintaining an erection or controlling ejaculation, and recommend appropriate treatments or therapies.

These difficulties may be related to physical factors such as overall health problems, hormonal problems or circulatory problems. They may also be caused by psychological factors such as stress, anxiety or depression. By discussing your concerns with a healthcare professional, you’ll get advice and treatment tailored to your situation to improve your sex life.