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Temperature play is extremely effective because it activates the nerve endings and plays on the element of surprise. Your brain is immediately alerted to the hot/cold contrast, amplifying pleasure and heightening arousal. Before getting started, take a moment to speak to your partner about each other's limits and desires. Strong communication will help you gauge the perfect level of intensity and make the experience as pleasurable as possible.
Give Your Partner Chills With Ice Cubes
Surprise your partner with ice cubes! The sudden sensation of cold is sure to arouse your lover when you slide ice all over their most sensitive erogenous zones (e.g. nipples, penis, clit, etc.).
To make things even more surprising, blindfold them to increase their sensations!
You can also use other foods from the freezer, like ice cream. Be careful not to leave ice or frozen food on their direct skin for too long.
To take things one step further, try alternating the coolness of ice with a tickle of warm breath or a kiss on the area. This quick contrast will no doubt have your partner going wild.
If putting ice directly onto the body seems a little too extreme, try slipping a cube into a cloth, so the shock is less harsh.
Another possibility is to let an ice cube melt in your mouth before kissing your partner on their neck, torso or thigh. Try less sensitive areas first (like the arm or the shoulder) before heading towards the erogenous zones, so as to make sure the contrast isn’t too much for your partner.
Heat Things Up With Candle Wax
Hot wax is bound to raise the temperature in your bedroom. Tie your partner's hands to the bed and drip trails of hot wax on their chest or back before moving on to other more sensitive areas, such as their arms or thighs.
Be careful to avoid their genitals, which are a little too sensitive for this game!
Make sure that you use BDSM candles that are suitable for sex play. Ordinary candles are much too hot, making them unsuitable for intimate play. Always check the temperature of the wax before using it.
Turn Your Partner on With Heated Massage Oil
Another tip is to give your partner a hot oil massage. The warmth of the oil will help them relax and get ready for more intense lovemaking.
If you want to give your partner a full body massage, check out our article How to give your partner an erotic massage to make your session absolutely unforgettable!
Play With a Heated Sex Toy
You can choose the sex toy that suits you best from a wide range of options: dildos, masturbators, vibrators or prostate massagers.
Dare to Use a Sex Toy Made of Metal or Glass
Sex toys made of glass or metal (like dildos, anal plugs or prostate massagers) can be warmed up or cooled down for even more intense sensations. In the wintertime, dip your metal or glass sex toy in hot water. In the summer, dip it in cold water.
To avoid any risk of burns, test your hot or cold toy on a less sensitive part of the body before using it on your genitals.
Never use a microwave or boiling water to heat up your sex toy.
The golden rules of temperature play
- Communicate before, during and after play so that you can adjust and tweak your movements when needed.
- Always test the temperature on your inner arm before going near any intimate area.
- Take it step by step: start out light, then increase in intensity if desired.
- Always keep a bowl of lukewarm/cool water on hand, as well as a towel.
- Avoid zones where the skin is fragile or very thin to avoid causing harm.
By exploring these temperature games at your own pace, you will discover new sensations that are surprising and often unforgettable. The key is to remain attentive, respect your partner's limits, and transform these discoveries into moments of genuine intimacy. With gentleness, curiosity, and consent, these experiences will become moments of shared pleasure.
