Is it a good idea to sleep with your best friend?

Posted on 29 May 2024 by Natalia
Is it a good idea to sleep with your best friend?
The idea of crossing the line from friendship to physical intimacy with your best mate can be rather enticing for many. After all, a strong friendship is built on trust, camaraderie, and a deep understanding of each other, all seemingly ideal ingredients for a fulfilling sexual relationship. But is it truly a wise move? What are the potential perks and pitfalls of turning a friendship into a sexual liaison?
In this article, the LOVE Team will look into the various aspects of this delicate question, helping you weigh up the pros and cons before making a decision that could alter the nature of your relationship forever.

What are the advantages of sleeping with your best friend?

Deciding to cross the boundary between friendship and a sexual relationship with your best mate may seem like a good idea for several reasons. Here are some of the main reasons for which friends may be tempted to become something more:

You trust each other and feel safe around each other

Trust is the foundation of any successful intimate relationship. With a close friend, that trust is already firmly established, creating a safe and reassuring environment to explore a new dimension of the relationship. You know you can count on them to be honest, respectful, and kind.

You know them better than anyone (and vice versa)

A best friend already knows a lot about you: your preferences, your limits, your passions. This deep understanding can make the sexual experience more enjoyable, as there are fewer uncertainties and awkward moments. You can communicate your needs and desires more easily, leading to greater satisfaction for both partners.

You get along well

The camaraderie that already exists between you can be a major asset in an intimate relationship. This emotional bond strengthens the physical connection, making every moment shared more meaningful and enriching. The transition towards a sexual relationship can then be seen as a natural extension of your friendship.

You know how to communicate

Close friends are often more comfortable discussing delicate subjects. This openness makes it easier to have honest conversations about expectations, boundaries, and concerns related to a sexual relationship. Good communication helps to avoid misunderstandings and manage any dicey situations that may arise.

There’s less pressure and judgement

You can be yourself, without fear of judgement or rejection. This freedom to be authentic can make intimate moments more enjoyable and liberating.

What are the risks of sleeping with your best friend?

Engaging in a sexual relationship with your best mate has its advantages, but it's also essential to consider the potential downsides and risks involved.

Things might get emotionally complicated

Physical intimacy can intensify emotions, leading one partner to hope for a more serious romantic relationship. This can create an imbalance if the other doesn't share these feelings, resulting in tension and misunderstandings.


Another emotional risk is jealousy or possessiveness. When romantic feelings are added to a friendship, it's easy for one partner to become jealous or possessive, especially if the other continues to see other people.

You might lose your friend

Sex can sometimes lead to the end of a friendship. In some cases, when the sexual relationship is over, it becomes difficult to return to being just friends. Hurt feelings, regret, or even discomfort can make any interaction complicated.

You may not be sexually compatible

It's possible that each partner's sexual preferences and desires won't align. This lack of compatibility can lead to frustration and disappointment.
Unmet expectations in the bedroom can affect the friendship, creating feelings of awkwardness or disappointment. If the sexual experience is disappointing, it can leave a lasting and negative impression, making it difficult to continue a friendly relationship as before.

How to make an informed decision

Deciding to sleep with your best friend is a step that requires serious thought.

Assess your feelings

You should evaluate your own feelings as well as those of your friend. Take time to reflect on what this relationship means to you and what you expect from the experience. Ask yourself if your feelings are purely physical or if deeper emotions are at play.
Make sure you're comfortable with the situation and understand what you're truly feeling. At the same time, try to understand your friend's feelings to avoid misunderstandings and unshared expectations.

Be honest

Approach the subject honestly with your friend by discussing your expectations and boundaries. Be clear about what you’re hoping for and what you're willing to accept.
Create a space where both of you feel free to express your thoughts and feelings without fear of judgement. Honest communication can prevent many problems and clarify the intentions of both parties.

Consider the practical aspects

Think about the potential consequences for your shared social circle. How might this decision affect your other friendships and social relationships? Be aware of group dynamics and possible repercussions.
Preparing a plan to manage potential complications can help you anticipate and respond to problems that may arise. Consider what you'll do if the sexual relationship changes the dynamic of your friendship. Having a plan can provide better preparation and reduce stress related to uncertainty.
Deciding to sleep with your best friend is a complex decision that warrants careful thought. By weighing the pros and cons, assessing your feelings, and engaging in honest discussions, you can make an informed decision. Consider the practical consequences and be prepared to manage any potential complications.
Whatever your decision, ensure it's based on open communication and mutual respect, in order to preserve the valuable relationship you share.