Prostate Orgasm: The Ultimate Guide for Understanding and Exploring Your P-Spot

Prostate orgasm is still a fringe topic in scientific and medical research, even if it is drawing growing interest in sexology and gender studies. While the penile ejaculatory orgasm has been thoroughly examined, the notion that the prostate could act as an erogenous centre in its own right remains little known outside academic circles. For the wider public it is often surrounded by taboo, and sometimes weighed down with negative connotations (Dueñas, 2022).

Sometimes referred to as a P-spot orgasm, it is defined as an orgasmic experience triggered specifically through stimulation of the prostate, usually through the anus, whether with fingers, a sex toy or penetration (Levin, 2018). Men often describe it as deeper, more full-bodied and more diffused throughout the body, frequently occurring without ejaculation, which sets it apart from the more familiar penile orgasm (Arendt, 2023). Because it can feel like a loss of control, the experience may also stir up psychological resistance (Dueñas, 2022).

From the outset, this definition highlights two crucial distinctions: separating orgasm from ejaculation, which are too often seen as the same thing in Western culture, and recognising the prostate as a sexual organ in its own right rather than merely a gland linked to reproduction.

The prostate is a walnut-sized gland located just below the bladder and surrounding the urethra. It plays a dual role in urinary and reproductive functions (McNeal, 1988).

In her research, sexologist Delphine Dueñas (2022) found that men often describe this type of orgasm as more intense and more complete than the penile orgasm. Some authors compare it to the female orgasm, particularly because of its gradual build-up and longer duration. Achieving it usually requires more time and practice (Arendt, 2023), allowing men to integrate this source of pleasure as an extension of their usual sexual repertoire (Komisaruk et al., 2004).

A recent study shows that anal exploration is no longer as unusual among heterosexual men as it once was. In fact, 59 per cent of heterosexual men with no history of sex with other men reported having tried some form of anal penetration, including rimming , fingering or the use of sex toys. Forty-four per cent said they had engaged in anal masturbation alone, and 22 per cent of women reported penetrating their male partner’s anus, either occasionally (9 per cent) or on a regular basis (2 per cent) (Arendt, 2023).

These figures reflect a growing openness to experimentation, even if taboos and fears still linger.

To understand what sets the prostate orgasm apart, it helps to distinguish between the main types of male orgasm:

• Prostate orgasm: can occur with or without ejaculation, and sometimes involves retrograde ejaculation (when semen flows back into the bladder)
• Anal orgasm: triggered by stimulation of the anus, which is highly sensitive due to its rich nerve supply
• Penile orgasm: the most familiar form, typically associated with ejaculation (Arendt, 2023)
  

Clinical reports and case studies suggest that prostate orgasms can make multiple orgasms in males possible, a phenomenon rarely seen with penile–ejaculatory orgasm (Levin, 2018). This is because prostate orgasms may occur without ejaculation, bypassing the refractory period (the rest phase that follows climax). They can also be combined with other forms of stimulation, creating simultaneous orgasms that merge anal, prostate and penile pleasure (Arendt, 2023).

According to Arendt (2023), prostate massage may offer several benefits:

• Reducing performance anxiety
• Restoring pleasure in men experiencing erectile dysfunction
• Heightening sensory awareness in men with an ejaculation or delayed ejaculation

Of course, there are also medical contraindications to consider. Prostate massage should be avoided in cases of haemorrhoids, prostatitis, pain, or suspected or diagnosed prostate cancer.

Researchers have identified several barriers among men (Dueñas, 2022; Arendt, 2023):

• Societal taboos that associate anal penetration with homosexuality
• Seeing the practice as “dirty” or strictly for medical purposes
• Fear of seeming like less of a man or damaging the male identity
• Anxiety about pain or an unfamiliar kind of pleasure
• Worry that other practices may lose appeal if prostate orgasm feels “superior”
• Reluctance to ask a partner and fear of being judged

Some women also report their own aversion to male anal play:

• Viewing the practice as anatomically “unnatural”
• Feeling like the roles have been switched (from being penetrated to penetrating)
• Unease around a new form of desire or perceiving the act as “dirty”
• Fear of no longer being seen as an object of desire but merely a means to someone else’s pleasure
• Pressure to perform and anxiety about doing it “wrong”
  

Dueñas highlights the role of sensory learning. Just as a woman can learn to consider her vagina as “erotic”, a man can learn to eroticise his prostate through a process that involves relaxation and contraction, breathing techniques and repetition (Dueñas, 2022). Prostate orgasm requires patience, exploration and the ability to let go, which makes it comparable to the way female orgasm is often learned. This parallel can also encourage deeper mutual understanding within heterosexual couples (Arendt, 2023).

You can do regular Kegel exercises to strengthen and get familiar with your pelvic floor muscles, helping men get used to the sensations of contraction and release. Relaxation and breathing techniques, such as cardiac coherence breathing, also support the relaxation needed for prostate stimulation. Good hygiene plays a role too: this might include emptying the bowels, rinsing with an anal douche, and always using lube. Finally, an erotic prelude such as caressing or massaging the anus and perineum (the area between the scrotum and anus) is an essential part of preparation (Arendt, 2023).

When practising solo, lie on your back with your knees pulled up (a foetal-style position works well). With a partner, lying on your back with a cushion under your hips and your knees bent is often the most comfortable. Lubrication is essential, since the anus does not self-lubricate: apply plenty of lube to make things smooth and safe.

Start with gentle caresses of the perineum and/or anus, using fingers, tongue or a toy. Soft circles and light pressure can help the muscles relax until the anus begins to open. When the receiver is ready, slowly introduce a finger or toy, easing in about a centimetre at a time in sync with their breathing. Check in regularly about how they feel. The goal is to pass the two sphincters without pain, keeping in mind that the second one is more sensitive.

Insert your finger about two-thirds of the way in to find the prostate, which sits on the front wall of the rectum, around the “11 o’clock” position if you imagine a clock face. To the touch, it feels like a small rounded bump that is firm yet supple. Take your time: pause to let the receiver notice their sensations, encouraging small contractions of the anal muscles. Since the feelings can be surprising, it often takes a moment to adapt.

When ready, try gentle circular motions, rocking movements or light pressure against the prostate. At the same time, you can add a touch of pressure to the perineum (between the testicles and anus) to intensify the experience. Many find it helpful to practise two or three sessions of about 30 minutes each, with at least a day of rest in between.

Prostate massage in different positions:

The person receiving the massage should guide their partner by expressing what feels good, what doesn’t, and how much pressure or rhythm they want. New sensations are often hard to describe, sometimes even strange (such as an urge to urinate or tingling sparks). Open dialogue keeps the experience safe and positive. Erections may come and go, which is perfectly normal, and it is also common for seminal fluid to leak during the massage.

Interestingly, contrary to what many assume, reaching a prostate orgasm may actually be easier without stimulating the penis at the same time, especially in the beginning. When both erogenous zones are aroused simultaneously, the brain can feel overwhelmed and struggle to distinguish subtler prostate sensations from the more intense penile pleasure. Focusing on the prostate alone can make it easier to recognise and embrace this new kind of orgasm (Arendt, 2023).

Encouraging men to achieve prostate orgasm requires recognising the prostate as a source of pleasure in both medical and social discussions. A cultural shift in this direction would give men the chance to explore new dimensions of pleasure without fear of stigma. It also opens up space to rethink gender roles and sexual expectations, paving the way for a more open approach to intimacy. Practised with gentleness and clear communication, prostate stimulation offers men the chance to engage with their bodies in new ways and to build a deeper understanding of their sensations and their pleasure.

Perfect for beginners, a small butt plug lets you discover anal stimulation gently. Its simple, tapered shape will help your body get used to the new sensations comfortably. Paired with a good quality lube, using a small plug is an excellent first step towards exploring your new favourite erogenous zone.

With its ergonomic curve, a manual prostate massager is designed to reach the prostate directly. More precise than a finger, it will help you locate and explore this sensitive spot effectively. Being manual, it also gives you complete control over the pressure and intensity.

For those seeking a more intense experience, automatic models deliver sensations closer to penetrative sex. A vibrating stimulator provides targeted vibrations that will increase prostate pleasure, while the thrusting version mimics the movement of a sexual encounter with a partner. These more advanced toys offer deep, consistent stimulation, often leading to powerful orgasms.