Anorgasmia uncovered

Posted on 27 October 2023 by Natalia
Anorgasmia uncovered

Ever heard whispers about anorgasmia during those intimate heart-to-hearts? It's one of those topics that's often kept on the down-low. While it can touch anyone's life, not many are open about it, leaving loads feeling a bit on the outs.

In this article, we're delving into the heart of the matter, getting to grips with what causes it. Always remember, everyone's journey with intimacy is unique, and we all deserve the inside scoop and a helping hand to navigate it confidently.

So, what's anorgasmia all about?

Anorgasmia is when there's a consistent or recurring lack of climax, even after the usual build-up and despite getting the right kind of stimulation and genuinely wanting to reach that peak. It's something that can affect folks of all ages, genders, and sexual orientations.

What's behind anorgasmia ? Some possible causes

  • Physical: Some medical conditions, neurological disorders, or hormonal issues can play a part in making it tricky to climax. Genital or pelvic surgeries, as well as conditions like multiple sclerosis, can also be culprits behind anorgasmia.
  • Mental and emotional: Feeling stressed out? Anxiety, past traumas, relationship hiccups, and even cultural or religious beliefs and taboos can all throw a spanner in the works when it comes to reaching that big O.
  • Medication-related: Watch out for some meds! Especially antidepressants, antipsychotics, or blood pressure tablets. They can sometimes have side effects that mess with your orgasmic function.

The different kinds of anorgasmia

  • Primary: This is when someone's never hit that high note, no matter the situation or partner.
  • Secondary: This pops up in folks who used to be able to climax but, for various reasons, can't quite get there anymore.
  • Situational: Here, someone can get to the finish line in certain scenarios or with certain partners, but not others. It might hinge on the type of stimulation, the setting, or even who they're with.

Sex toys: your secret weapon

Far from just cheeky bedroom accessories, sex toys can be game-changers for those looking to get to know their bodies, target specific pleasure zones, and tackle challenges like anorgasmia.

Exploration and stimulation

Using sex toys offers a fab chance to explore your own body in private. They provide targeted, consistent stimulation and can reach spots that our own mitts, or a partner's, might struggle to. For many, a whirl with a toy can be the first step towards figuring out what really gets their motor running.

Our top toy picks to beat anorgasmia

Vibrators: With a range of speeds and buzzing modes, these toys are a fave for delivering powerful, steady stimulation. They're versatile, great for external clit action or internal vibes.


Dildos: For those who fancy non-vibrating internal stimulation, dildos are spot on. They come in all shapes, sizes, and materials to suit your personal taste.


G-spot stimulators: Crafted to zero in on the G-spot, these toys might just be the golden ticket for some, unlocking sensations they've never felt before.

Our top tips to tackle anorgasmia

Reaching the big O is a journey as unique as each and every one of us. For some, the path might have a few bumps, but with the right moves, you can glide smoothly towards pleasure-town. Here are some pointers to help conquer anorgasmia.

Solo exploration: Having a little 'me-time' is crucial to suss out what gets you going, at what pace, and how intensely. It's a judgement-free zone to experiment and learn what tickles your fancy. The more clued up we are about our bodies and what turns us on, the better we can relay that to a partner.

Relaxation techniques: Your noggin plays a massive part in your sexual response. If you're feeling frazzled, anxious, or just plain distracted, reaching climax can be a bit of a mission. Here are some techniques to help you out:

  • Deep breathing: Taking long, deep breaths can help calm the mind and zero in on bodily sensations.
  • Meditation: Short meditation sessions can help refocus the mind and banish those pesky distractions.
  • Chill-out baths: Warm water and a few drops of essential oils can help relax the body and set the mood for intimacy.

And remember, you're not flying solo on this quest. Whether it's through self-exploration, relaxation techniques, or seeking professional advice, there are plenty of routes to pleasure and satisfaction.