Is Your Penis Running the Show? How To Deal With Unwanted Erections

The male body is incredibly reactive, and erections are simply one of many complex reflexes that can’t always be controlled. Understanding why this happens and how better to deal with the situation if it arises can help you to feel more at ease in your daily life.

In this article, the LOVE Team will be going into depth on where these ‘random erections’ come from, how to differentiate between a natural reflex and something you might want to keep an eye on. We’ll also provide you with a few pieces of advice to help you regain control of your body in an intuitive way.

Erections are actually a sign that your body is functioning as it should. Sometimes, however, they can come on without warning, in utterly unsexy situations. During a meeting, in class, at the gym, or even whilst just walking down the street.

This type of erection, that we’re calling ‘random’ or ‘unwanted’, is often the product of a nervous or hormonal reflex that has absolutely nothing to do with voluntary stimulation. Male bodies are extremely sensitive: a brush, a fleeting thought, a saucy flashback, or simply the body relaxing can be enough to activate such a reflex.

There are several types of erection that exist:

• Reflexogenic erections, provoked by direct stimulation (small or large)
• Psychogenic erections, come on through thoughts and feelings of desire
• Nocturnal erections, are linked to hormonal activity during REM sleep

In other words, erections aren’t always directly linked to sexual arousal, they can also be nervous or hormonal, which are entirely normal.

There are multiple reasons for you to get a surprise erection:

The body is overrun with hormonal changes during puberty and adolescence. Spikes in testosterone combined with increased sensitivity of the nervous system make random erections extremely common. Amongst adults, light manual stimulation (tight clothing, brushing against the area, sitting down for a long time…) has an impact.

The brain plays a key role in erections. A dirty thought, memory, or even more basic emotions can cause a physical reaction. On the contrary, stress, fatigue or anxiety can mess up the control you have over your body, provoking unpredictable reactions.

Certain types of medication (antidepressants, hormonal treatments, stimulants) can influence your blood flow and favour prolonged erections. Similarly, the overconsumption of pornography, or a period of prolonged abstinence, can increase the body’s reactivity.

It’s important to be able to tell the difference between an unwanted erection and priapism, meaning a painful, persistent erection that lasts multiple hours. The latter requires urgent medical attention.

In most cases, unwanted erections are temporary and nothing to worry about. It can be embarrassing, but isn’t necessarily a medical issue. Here are a few tips to help you discreetly deal with your problem:

• Change position or cross your legs: this can help to decrease blood pressure in the area.
• Take deep breaths: work on taking the focus off the affected area, instead concentrate on slow, regular breathing that will help to calm the nervous system.
• Distract yourself: think about something else (sports, your to-do list for the day, a random non-sexual memory) to help reduce mental stimuli.
• Wear suitable clothing: (looser trousers, comfortable underwear) will help to limit friction, thus unwanted erections.

In the long term, it could be beneficial to work on stress management and channelling your desire. Regular exercise, meditation, or controlled masturbation can all help to stabilise your libido and decrease the frequency with which unwanted erections appear.

Want to talk about it with a partner? Be open and free from embarrassment when bringing it up, this will make the conversation less of a deal. It’s a bodily reflex, that’s all. Sometimes, your random erection could even become a starting point for an intimate moment between the two of you.

Learning to better understand your body means learning to listen to it. Spontaneous erections aren’t a sign that things aren’t working, on the other hand, they’re a sign that the body is reactive and therefore healthy.

If they start to become too common or even bothersome, there are a few simple adjustments you can make (a more regular sexual rhythm, a healthy lifestyle, managing relaxation levels) to get back to normal.

In reality, surprise erections aren’t necessarily a problem that needs solving: they’re often just a reminder that you feel desire. If we take a little perspective, all that you really need to do is breathe, wait… and let nature do its thing.